yet another day of memories...
yet another day of memories...
yet another day of memories...
yet another day of memories...
yet another day of memories...
yet another day of memories...
yet another day of memories...
yet another day of memories...
yet another day of memories...
yet another day of memories...
yet another day of memories...
yet another day of memories...
yet another day of memories...
Yes, busy again.
Now preparing for the new school term
*gasp*
Yes, School starts next week for me.
Kinda feels like i am just flipping between school and work;
Little time for the transition,
So squeezing as much time as I can
To clear my laptop/files
And get all geared up for school =]
What with the 2 different week-system of NUS & SMU;
I foresee a very blur cynthia
Potentially getting alittle lost
I sure hope not..
Dear friends of mine in both uni,
pls give me a shake
And a guide if I get corn-fused =P
*Bad joke
But yes! I need help badly;
Especially if this memory lapse of mine continues..
Misplaced my phone batt temporarily today
Hunted my whole room before I found it.
And I thought I switched off my sister's light yesterday night
When obviously I thought wrong since it was on this morning =[
Not forgetting (for once!)
The many many times this 2 days that I keep forgetting what I want to tell others
Gee.. that feeling is terrible..
You got the person's attention,
then you forget what you want to say.
*frowns*
And yes.. the many times i walk to a spot,
only to forget what I wanted to do
*frowns again*
May this lapse be temporary
& wear off soon..
12/29/2005 02:57:00 AM
and the day of Christmas is ushered in,
it's not only the season of giving,
but also the season of thanks.
Top on the list:
-Yearmateys-
Thank you so much guys, for seeing me through everything.
And i mean everything.
Thanks Jo, for being my only fwen;
And for always taking care of me in your ways.
Thanks Penny dear, for accepting me as I am
And for always being the rah-rah organiser..
I know its never easy.
And of course, thanks for the countless gatherings,
Of catching up with one another
And enquiring about each other's life, namely the love aspect =p
Thanks for giving me so much memories,
And for being the ones I know I can always count on..
We have been through so much,
I know we will see each other through adulthood and more..
-Juniors-
Thank you so much to all of you
You all have been a great source of motivation;
You might not know it,
But the words of encouragment,
And the knowledge of what I have done for you..
They have been motivating me when the going gets tough.
Thanks especially to 1-2
For all the support you've given me..
Thanks for the cyber sanctuary
People whom I have fell for/loved in the special way
Thanks alot for the lessons you have taught me
Code 22: Thanks for making me aware of the strength I never knew I have
Code 25: Thanks for cherishing and loving me the way you do
Code 28: Thanks for helping me to self-discover more than I ever can alone
Friends
Thanks for being part of the support system;
I may not really remind you all of how much you mean to me
But each and every one of you counts
In making my life a better one..
And if you are reading this now..
You are a friend 'kay?
Don't discount yourself..
Thanks alot guys..
You all have given me so much,
Enrich my life to such a great extent.
I love you all
12/25/2005 02:51:00 AM
You Are 30% Boyish and 70% Girlish
Even if you're not a girl, you're very feminine.
You're in touch with your feelings, and your heart rules you.
A bit of a emotional roller coaster, one moment you're up and the next you're down.
But no matter what, you try to be as cute and perky as possible.
12/24/2005 04:11:00 AM
Yearmates -Jorin, Huiyi, Cathleen, Ivy and a new addition, Penny
JC-mates- Lydia, Huifen, Ying Jie
School people -Leon, Irene(who is also one), Duan & Meiju
Family -Joyce (who is also one)
I thought alot of people knew,
But looking at this list;
It does seem very few ya?
Reactions vary;
From the vocal acceptance..to the silent ones.. to those who express denial
Believing that one day, I will meet a man, and change *poof =]
To those who accept totally,
I am so thankful towards you.
Thanks so much for your unconditional acceptance;
To those in denial,
I don't blame you.
It's your way of coping
& I am thankful that you din push me away.
Nearly came out to Mommy last night
The conversation we had on the bus was so intensive;
She wanted me to be open,
To remove the barrier between us.
*seems like subconsciously, I build up barriers between pple and me
She told me that I am her daughter
She told me she loved me
She told me too.. that she hope I ain one.
For a moment I was lost;
For a moment I wavered..
Then the gates were shut,
I chickened out.
Perhaps one day..
One day I will
Mommy & Daddy, I really love you.
As your daughter, I do love the both of you, I do want no barriers between us.
I am scared..
for being a lesbian is not what both of you had in your plans for me.
No matter what, I am still me;
I still love you both.
Do you hear me still?
12/20/2005 04:17:00 AM
Thought that having a picnic at Botanic Gardens was unique
But then again, I was not 100% happy with the idea..
For a long time, I was unable to find the reason behind that.
Now I know..
A picnic can be given at any time.
What sets it apart for my 21st?
What is the special link?
None
None at all.. =[
And so I decide,
That 21st being the symbol of independence;
I should do something that illustrates that.
And I am decided..
I am flying to Canada;
Visit my friends there,
Plus check out UBC where I am thinking of taking an exchange.
Taking a flight on my own;
A trifle terrifying
But I think I can do it.
Planning my own accomodation;
Handling everything on my own,
Thats what I call independence.
Sourcing around for contacts,
Making sure that I have seen to everything that needs me to,
Setting up back up plans,
Ensuring that I will survive
Thats what comes with independence
Been toying with the idea;
Finally decided to take some action
Accomodation found;
Ticket prices realised;
Dates set
But guess what..
Mom doesnt even want to talk to me
I understand her reservations;
I understand her fears..
I am scared too;
But i need to do this
For myself;
For my own beliefs
And survival
Its a need, apart from a want
Do you, as my friend, understand me?
Parents need to realise this;
That we can't hide under their apron strings for life
To teach your kids survival
Is to let them learn how to fall
Again and again
Not prevent them from falling at all;
Nor prevent them from falling after once.
Sighz..
All the joy marred by these unhappiness
12/17/2005 06:05:00 PM
How all our lives,
people are simply constantly fighting their fears;
Or fleeing away from them.
I have my own struggles to deal with too
I fear.. being lonely emotionally
Not knowing how to cope with negative feelings;
Not knowing who to turn to
Yet needing to let it all out
I fear.. being numb to all feelings
A solution to avoiding the emotional loneliness
But yet being unfeeling removes the very root of what makes me
I fear.. being cynical to the point that I don't trust
Then again.. what if I trust too easily..
That will only bring myself unnecessary hurt
*Oh.. what a thin line I have to tread
I fear.. being hurt so much so that I can't even cry it out
Surely it must be very painful then,
To hide all the emotions behind a mask.
And not be able to let it all surface
But my greatest fear of all..
Is that I will not be able to conquer all these fears.
12/14/2005 03:17:00 AM
Even started on writing a few local ones.
Am going to continue at work tml.
I think thats the good thing about working as a receptionist;
You get to have the discipline to write your cards on time =P
Work was pretty alright today.
Fumbled alot initially;
Cos its been quite awhile since I just did this.
One year ago to be exact.
And guess what,
The world still doesn't change.
I still get quirky weird phone calls..
Who help me to explain the psyche of mankind a lil better =]
1. People who call and ask for other VWO's numbers.
They then insist and try means & ways to get it even though you explain to them that you are not 100. These people are best dealt with by giving them another number, which serves to "help" their purpose.
Remember: any number that seems to help will do =]
2. People who call and insist that they be attended to immediately
It's kinda freaky how people cannot accept that other people are busy at the moment, and they want a reply asap. Rule of thumb here is to be firm and just repeat until hopefully they get the point.
Okay.. summarized above
Shall illustrate more examples as I go in the coming days
Interesting people i meet ya?
Kinda drives the Monday's blues away =]
12/13/2005 03:31:00 AM
1. She screens your calls (a.k.a she knows if its personal or business calls)
2. She knows how long your calls are (whether you are working or chatting alot)
3. She filters your letters coming in and going out (Could be fodder for gossip)
4. She is the key to booking transport and rooms (Priority networking)
5. She is the base for all gossip channels.. being at the entrance of everything
And that was what I re-capped from the first day of work =p
Just something tongue-in-cheek to lighten things up.
Updates so far
Looking back,
I think I have been insane to have worn those heels
Went shopping after work with mom somemore
Guess how high those heels were?
Took bets from Mom & Sis..
Who of cos din pay up after that..
One guessed 9cm; the other 7cm
The correct answer is 8.5cm =]
Anyway.. managed to finish most of my overseas presents..
Okay, gtg.. update later
12/11/2005 05:21:00 PM
Was super busy the last few days
Meeting up with secondary sch friends;
Spending time with family etc
Not forgetting..
I need to rush out several Christmas gifts!
Yes, its very early right?
But with the huge increase of about 100% in the number of ppl overseas,
(*Hint: statistics can be misleading)
I must start even earlier to be in time!
For the other locals out there..
no worries..
I will start on yours after I am done with these..
Aiming to finish overseas mail by Saturday
And then can start writing the other cards at work.
Lucky for work, it gives me the discipline to write cards
Cos of the sheer boredom if I don't.
Last year.. this worked for me
Hope it does this year too!~
Am all packed for my first day tml
Wun be bored at all..
Since i plan to write 3 cards & 1 letter
Plus bring a book to read..
Should be just nice..
=]
12/09/2005 02:49:00 AM
And I just cant help stop the tears from flowing down.
I miss the good old days
The days of innocence, and hustle
Where everything done just puts a smile on my face now.
The memories I have now though
Can never be enough
To relive those days again.
These are memories of my yearmates and I.
Together, we sweat, toiled and cried
Hung on to each other in Sec 1 when we were all lost sheep;
Still remembered how Huiyi helped me put on my bedsheet
during our first training camp
Got punished together through the 3 years of being juniors;
All the endless pumpings we did
Helped one another through when we took turns to be i/c-s
Learning dances/songs for performances, punishment-items
Not forgetting the endless drills sessions we have together;
First to guide our new yearmates along..
Then to "perfect" our GOH drills
Together we went up to Sec 4
Aided each other in the running of the unit
Egged one another on in the studies for prelims & the Big O's
Fought hard that year to bring back so many trophies for the unit
Gosh, I miss u guys so badly.
There are so many so many memories that we have together
Not forgetting prom night:
20 people in 2 rooms..
And elly sashaying out of the steaming hot bathroom
Holding her push-up bra.. and advertising it to us..
And yes, me always chasing and bugging u all to pay $$
Like a big loanshark..
Plus the cleaning up at the chalet;
Think no one ever did such a thorough clean up like us.
So here I am..
Kudos to our friendship.
May we be always sisters for life
-RGSRCY Yr 4' 2001-
we had joy we had fun
we had seasons in the sun
but the wine and the song
like the seasons have all gone
12/06/2005 05:29:00 AM
Hee.. and found my Biz Law scribblings
Out of everything I learnt,
Realised that I got the most kick out of using Latin phrases
So here goes:
volenti non fit injuria
Anyone knows what it means?
I will give you an example here:
To my future partner,
By loving you and committing to you,
I am agreeing to be vulnerable to you.
So thus, if you end up hurting me..
It cannot be considered an injury.
Easy to conclude the latin principle now?
And another one:
This is one of my favourites.
Consensus ad idem
This phrase is beautiful;
It illustrates the chemistry between 2 people =]
Will write in more next time =]
*Maybe I should take a module in Latin..
Introductory Latin 101 =p
12/04/2005 01:54:00 AM
But I am not feeling cold.
I have the love of friends
Of special ones,
And myself.
Yes, I have changed my blogskin
Do you feel loved today?
If not, give yourself a hug
Learn to love yourself.
I realised that each blogskin change
Marks a new stage of my life.
Guess this change was long overdue then
Many thanks goes to Silver
What was a mammoth task to me,
Turns out to be a one-hour job for her.
IT specialist help, anyone?
She will be delighted to help =]
Thanks Silver, I owe you 1 big one..
You made me happy =]
12/03/2005 03:17:00 AM
Was previously busy with exams
And after that,
Socializing & making a long long list
Of the things I need to do.
Sheesh.. wasn't intending to blog
But I guess I just wanted to put what I felt about something today in print.
Jo told me that Dor wanted me in
as part of the International Friendship and Arts Focus Committee,
either as a member or co-chair or something.
It did not matter.
Jo rejected on my behalf;
Told Dor that I have already left.
Coz I have already sang my swan song
Did my last event earlier on this year
I think its' sad
The arts is my passion
Something that I would love to do
But the people in the committee;
The politics that I would have to deal with,
Is not something that I can handle.
And when politics clashes with passion
I feel saddened to say
I rather compromise on my passion.
Given a chance,
I would love to volunteer for the arts
But I know,
signing on the focus group
ultimately means 30% arts, 70% people relations
A tough choice to make
The arts are just such a temptation.
Link Talentime had its plenty share of politics
But the pieces did by the kids were fulfilling
When opportunities like that arise,
its alwys hard to stay firm
But i will..
I must remind myself
that such stuff are just a political climb upward
And ultimately, what I gained is not in the arts
Rather, its in the arena of political play
I wish..
I wish..
12/02/2005 03:57:00 AM
Dreams
To be out and open
Independence
To be totally Christ-like
I believe that:
Courage is not an absence of fear
but the willingness to face up to the circumstances in spite of the fear.
Desires
A Pair of Pretty Sandals!
CPA! Achieved!
Investment Guru
dislikes
creepy crawly "things"
Unnecessary politics
Goals
get driving license
start my own business
to create my own hedge fund
older memories
my past journey